Naked Spa

So I'm on vacation and I wanted to do something that I can't do in my home town.  So my cousin tells me there is this spa where you can get a great body scrub and a awesome massage.  I say Great I'm all for a massage.  What's this body scrub you speak of.  She tells me Oh these ladies scrub your body really good and there are oils and you smell and feel great.  OKAY sign me up. Then she says "oh and your naked and everyone else is naked!  Silence....I didn't tell you that first?  Uh no.... Silence again....But it's a really great experience.  OooooKay, Let's do it.

I am sooooo glad I did it.  The whole experience was awesome! Let's start with the sauna's.  There were different rooms that did different things for your body.  You could detox in the salt room or speed up your metabolism  in the red clay room.  You can cool off in the blue onyx room or just lay out on the mats. You can spend as much time as you wanted to in each of the different sauna rooms.  I saw people with books and laptops just relaxing on the mats.  They have these great chairs that hug you when you sit down.  Once you've had your fill of the sauna area you can head back to the bathing pools.

Sounds icky right...Wrong!  It's like a pool area that has different temperatures in the water.  And the jets!  Oh man the jets are like mini massages.  But if you plan to get a scrub you must be in the bathe area 30 minutes prior to you getting your scrub.  I'm not gonna lie.  The naked part was kinda hard to accept when I first heard but I gotta tell you, once you see other ladies naked and walking around like they are not naked and you get naked and walk as fast as you can to the pool, you don't worry about it as much.  The scrub/massage combo was AMAZING!!  I'm telling you it was, is, will forever be the best thing ever!!!  My skin is soft on a regular basis but after this scrub, my skin was baby smooth.  I want one of these spas in my town.  I can't say enough it was the BEST!!! I'm still feeling good and it's been a day since I've done it.

Well that's really all I have to say about my experience at the spa.  The sauna rooms were perfect and the scrub in the bath area was the best!  If and when I do come back to the DC/Maryland area SPA WORLD will be on the list.

Until next time....

Rho

SO what had happened was....

Well I'm sure many of you who read my last  post, are wondering what became of the lizard that invaded my home a few nights ago.  Well.... I'm sad to report it has passed on into whatever place dead lizards go when they die.  My condition did not allow for me to check to see if it was still under the pot in which we caught it in.  Today when my cousin came by he removed it and it was not moving.  I can't say that I'm really sorry that it did not make it.  When it comes to lizards it comes down to ME or THEM and every time I'm going to  choose ME!  I want to thank my cousin for removing it.  It was cramping my style. Every time I walked by the pot I made a huge circle around it like the lizard was gonna knock over the pot and get me.  I know, SAD....




Till Next time


Rho

Lizards

As many of you know I am DEATHLY AFRAID OF LIZARDS!!!  It's a phobia.  It's called  scoliodentosaurophobia.  It's like a dinosaur that hasn't been discovered.  Nothing brings out this fear like a lizard in the house!  When a lizard gets into the house I hit bat like craziness. I can't speak in full sentences, I'm what one might call hysterical.  I'm talking straight jacket ape crazy!  I FREAK OUT!!!  My only thought is how am I going to kill this thing that has so foolishly come into my residence.  Look I don't go outside and invade their bush, or light fixture, or hide under the mail box so when they come and get the mail I stick my head out and go BOO!  I think it's only fair that they stay outside and I stay in.  But every once in a while one of those little suckers gets in the house.  It's usually when the person I live with is away and can't catch and release.  I'm going to tell you right now that I don't believe in catch and release.  Don't leave me any hater comments about freeing the lizards.  I don't care that they are harmless.  See the first three sentences if you have any doubt about my belief in non catch and release.
SO of course the thing that prompts this post is that one of those creatures got into the house tonight.  I had planned on being in bed to play a little candy crush saga before I drifted off to la la land.  However after my sister let the dog out, there on the blind I noticed a flesh colored LIZARD hanging out on the blinds.  SISTER!!! ( I will leave her name less and only refer to her as SISTER)  THERE'S A LIZARD ON THE BLINDS INSIDE THE HOUSE!!!! HURRY COME QUICK!!
Now altho she is not DEATHLY afraid of Lizards she is in fact afraid of them.  But because I go absolutely bananas when I encounter one she has to bite the bullet and be the lizard extractor.  (Hey I got the spiders which is far more dangerous than lizards since some spiders can be deadly)  But I'm not afraid of them.
Back to the story.... So SISTER comes in and is like CRAP!  What do we do?  Now we are two grown adult people trying to plot on how to get rid of the little lizard( See I do know that I am bigger than the lizard) If there were hidden cameras in our house this would be on YouTube so quick...
So I have a fly swatter in one hand and a broom in the other (this is war man!) SISTER picks up a trash can and the top of a cardboard box. Her idea is that she will scoop the lizard up and then put the cardboard box on top and then trow the lizard out.  Easy as Pie...Right?
WRONG!!!  I'm looking at her like WHAT?  What exactly is going to happen?  What if the lizard doesn't get in the trash can and then it's on you and you throw the can and the lizard flies though the air and lands on my face.. (which would never happen cuz once I see that the lizard did not make it in the trash can all that will be left of me in that room will be the sound of me running out the room into my room slamming the door and stuffing towels under the door so the lizard won't get in) So on to the next plan.  Which let me just say is not any better.
Okay,okay we got a plan.  This is how it all went down!

ME: SISTER get that big pot from under the sink the big stock pot. We can catch the lizard in that and since it's so deep we will have plenty of time to put the top on it.
SISTER: Okay, but how about if  I cover the lizard (which is still hanging out on the blinds) and then scoop the lid on and catch it that way.
 ME: UMMMMM....how is that gonna work?  Why not just smoosh it with the bottom and be done with this?
SISTER:  But that's so gross and I think I might press to hard a break the glass.
 ME:  Okay let's Google how to stun a lizard (I figure if we can stun him in to stun ness we can remove him while he's stunned where's  Harry Potter when you need him)
 SISTER: Okay google it.
 ME:  Google says to stun a lizard throw ICE COLD water on it.  It stuns them and then you can remove the lizard from your home.  ( desperate times people, desperate times)
SISTER:  That doesn't sound like that is gonna work.
ME: Of course it's gonna work, it says so on Google!  (this is what happens when you have scoliodentosaurophobia ) anything sounds good
SISTER:  OKAY you throw the water (I look at her like she's lost her mind, ME throw the water is she NUTS)?  and I'll put the pot over him while he's stunned.
So can you guess how this played out? NO? Well I threw the water the lizard jumped off the blinds (not stunned in the least little bit) and took off like a bat out of hell.  While both SISTER and ME are screaming like someone is killing us and SISTER is running round with the pot trying not to let the lizard get anywhere we can't get to him to smoosh him with the fly swatter (which I still have in my hand).
So this is the final outcome of the Battle of the Great Lizard

If you look closely you can see the tail that got caught when SISTER was scooting the pot across the floor and got the tail and it came off.  OH LORD!  I thought that was going to be the game changer and the Lizard was going to win....
Humans:1 Lizard: 1
All I can say is I hope that pot holds!

Till Next Time


Rho

My New Goal

Okay Folks,
Everyone has an idea of what they want to be when they grow up.  Some people want to be Doctors, some Lawyers, Some want to be Teachers, or CEO's.  I never really had an idea of what I would want to do for the rest of my life.  If not for the rest of my life then for the next 50 years or so. When I started working at 15 it was because my dad didn't give me spending money.  I wanted to have my own money so that I could buy my own things.  So I got a job.  Just a little side job making a little cash.  I have not stopped working since I started working!  I have worked non stop since I was 15!  I can't retire until I'm like 69-70!  That's another 30+ years left to work!  I don't think I can do it! I have Job ADD.  My resume reads like a Rap Sheet.  So as I thought about all of this I have decided what I want to be when I grow up.  (well get more grown).
I want to be a lady of leisure!  Yup I said it. I don't want to work anymore.  It won't matter what I do if it's labeled work I don't want to do it.  So you say I'll get bored with not going to work.  Well I tell you I won't. That's the whole point of being a lady of leisure.  If I choose to get up and do some work it will be what I want, when I want and how long I want to do it.  I know I'm not being realistic.  But then I think the Kardashians became famous for not being famous.  Why can't I become a lady of leisure? Maybe the reason I have Job ADD is because I'm not really supposed to work.  My main purpose of my life is to become a lady of leisure.  Now you may ask: How does one become a lady of leisure?  Well if I knew that I would be doing it......


Till next time,

Rho

Just a little Update

I know it's been a while since I've blogged.  Can you believe that nothing has been going on?!  Yeah I can't make that statement seem believable. Lot's of things have been going on.  I've started a new job and I've been in training for 6 weeks!  And I have 2 more weeks to go.  That's a tough training schedule.  So my last job only required me to use 5% of my brain usage.  This new job I have to use 95% of it.  The sleeping 95% is taking forever to WAKE UP!!!  But I'm working on it.  If it doesn't get moving I'm going to have to Fake it till I make it.  HA.  But I have to say I like the job.  I feel that I'm actually doing something worth doing.  I think (gasp) I might have found a job I can stick with for longer than a year.  I'm even rolling over in my mind (another gasp) a five year plan!!  Holy Smokes Folks!! I haven't thought about a long term job stay since I was at the Sheriffs office!  I know I'm just as surprised as you are.  Everyone who knows me knows I have job ADD.  Most likely job ADHD.  It's extremely hard for me to stay put. That's what's going on in my life at the moment.  Oh for those of you who followed my old blog Getting Rid of the Fat Girl, I'm on track to actually doing that. I have a goal size in mind to get to by Dec. 31.  I'll let you know if I make it.  Till next time.


Rho

Sick and Tired of being SICK!!!

So I've been sick for like 3 weeks.  I got sick on a Thursday stayed home from my job on Friday and Monday, went to my old job on Tuesday worked all week still sick.  Got better before I started my new job.  Worked all week my first week not sick until Thursday!  Then BAM! SICK! Monday after work went to the Care spot to see what was going on.  Tested for Strep and the FLU which the Dr. was pretty sure I had the FLU.  Both test came back NEGATIVE for either one!! So the Dr. guesses (which is what I'm thinking) that it was a sinus infection, prescribes a 5 day Zpack because it's not a big sinus infection just a little one (AS IF..remember when we used to say that?  Anyway I digress) My throat was so raw and I had a little cough, a fever and wanted to die.  Flash forward to today and my throat is not so raw, My cough sounds like I'm trying to expel every organ in my body up through my mouth, I have no voice.  But on the plus side I have no fever.  But if this coughing doesn't stop I'm going to lose my mind!!!
Since I have no voice I've been playing my own little game of charades.  It's funny really.  My sister is AWESOME at knowing exactly what I'm trying to say.  Also one of my friends is great at it.  However.  I have noticed that because I can't communicative verbally, the people who can talk are using hand motions and whispering also!   Really!??  YOU CAN TALK, I CAN HEAR!  Why are you doing that?  The lady at the bank did that today.  I deposited my check and she said hi I waved and motioned that I couldn't talk and she whispered back to me.  SMH.  Oh well it's funny.  Hopefully I'll get my voice and health back soon!   I'm tired of not talking. Of course I'm sure everyone else is glad for the break.  LOL.
Hoping to get well SOON.  Till then.....

Work is NOT Working!

So Thursday at work was a doozie. First I get into work and I have an email from a co-worker from my boss asking me to call her.  Okay fine.  I call the number and it goes to a voicemail that says this is Randy.  Okay maybe this is her husbands phone and she is using it.  Then I get to thinking.  Is her husbands name Randy?  So I email co-worker and ask "Is our bosses husbands name Randy?"  She emails me back uh..I think his name is Cliff?!!  WTW??  SO who did I call and leave a message with?  Ugh.... I email CW back and ask if this is the right number the boss emailed to her to email to me...She emails me back ummmm that is not the number..  The boss had given me the WRONG number to call.  I mean really,  How do you send and email to have someone call you and it's the WRONG number!  See what I'm working with?  So that was the small little snowball that ended up with an avalanche.  So the boss didn't come in and the person who has to do the mail did not come in.  I was stuck doing three peoples job not only on Thursday but on Friday as well.  Look I'm all about being a Team Player and all but when your supervisor only has one person to back people up and that person calls in and only one person (Me) is left holding the bag it starts to get real old, real quick.
It was like a chain of fools.  Everyone seemed to forget what it is that they were supposed to do.  I am but one person.  I had people coming at me from all sides.  Supervisors from other departments suddenly had questions about work that I had no answer to because my Supervisor didn't give me that information.  It was crazy town and the crazies were out.  Then I had my co-worker who I will just call Tweddle (because she looks like Tweddle Dee's and Tweddle Dums little sister)  Who I don't make conversation with at all because she annoys the snot out of me, Ask me the dumbest question EVER!!!!!   I think it was just because I had not showed her any attention that day because I was dealing with bigger problems! Just do your job! Anyway this crap went on for two days because my supervisor didn't come in Thursday or Friday and neither did the mail girl.  I had to adjust my time schedule for getting off on Friday to accommodate the work flow for my department.  Did I mention that I am in NO way a SUPERVISOR??!!
So yesterday this is what I did :  Happy Weekend!
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?
fbid=4195848814639&set=a.3523111956638.2134798.1237260606&type=1&relevant_count=1&ref=nf

Rho